The Disappointment Zone

Musings from a Cleveland sports fan

Slow decline to terrible just accelerated

Posted by disappointmentzone on 29 November 2006

Ryan Tucker is arguably the best offensive lineman on the Browns (active) roster. That said, if you’ve watched the Browns play this season you know that last sentence doesn’t necessarily carry much weight. I mean, the offensive line is bad. But now we’ll be able to assess just how critical Tucker is to the O-Line because they will no longer have him there to participate in the orgy of missed blocks and holding penalties that occurs every Sunday afternoon. That’s right: Tucker will miss the rest of the season.

Why?

Undisclosed illness.

Hmmmm…

That sound you just heard was half of Cleveland vomiting because they just imagined the prospect of watching the Browns play professional football with an even worse offensive line than the one that’s been playing.

Of course, our illness has a name. One that we are more than willing to disclose.

It’s called Being A Browns Fan.

There is no cure.

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4 Responses to “Slow decline to terrible just accelerated”

  1. Erik said

    Sure there’s a cure. It’s called “Don’t watch.”

    I don’t know about anyone else, but it’s far more depressing to me when the Indians are bad, because they display their suckiness every night for all to see.

    As far as the Browns go, it is far easier to preoccupy yourself for three hours on a Sunday. I have plenty of Christmas shopping to take up my Sunday afternoons for the month of December.

    I’ll still check in on the Browns, and if they’re winning, I’ll probably watch. But Browns games are no longer the weekly event they used to be. It’s just a football game now.

    For me, the foibles of the Browns have kind of rendered the NFL irrelevant for me. I find myself not really caring who the Super Bowl contenders are, who is in the MVP chase, because none of it concerns the Browns.

    Once you get past Ohio State, I can really take or leave football at the moment. I know I’m not alone in feeling that way.

  2. “Don’t watch” isn’t a cure. It’s a coping mechanism.

    I like how whether watching the Browns or the Indians suck is a worse experience. Cleveland sports. Gotta love ’em.

  3. Erik said

    Unfortunately, the cure is out of our hands. Only about a dozen guys can cure the suck. You know the names: Randy Lerner, Phil Savage, Mark Shapiro, Eric Wedge, Danny Ferry, etc.

    So I guess all we have left are coping mechanisms. Pass the Mylanta, please. Or scotch. Whatever works.

  4. Ferry is a bum. Shapiro is a genius. Wedge is uninspiring. Lerner is indifferent.

    Scotch is called for.

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